If I had to decide: I would put it as penetration or being penetrated with both (or multiple) persons willing to have a sexual experience to it's natural (non-interrupted) completion.
As such if a couple start coitus but one backs off and they complete 'outside her' because one does not want to go that far, I would say that they still could claim virginity. But if they back off to prevent pregnancy and complete outside her, I would say they are no longer virgins.
Carried over to male homosexual, it would be the same, but with just with anal sex as primary penetration method.
Carried over the female homosexuality, I would still say the same, one person needs to penetrate the other (even with a object), and the sex act has to conclude naturally/uninterrupted.
If oral counts or not is a individual choice, so again if I had to decide, that would be done by asking the person, as I see it as my personal choice, no oral does not normally count but could in some circumstances.
Last edited by kanicbird; Today at 06:54 AM.
Source: http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=661813
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